Harmony Hobbs is a freelance writer who navigates the waters of motherhood without any grace or finesse whatsoever. She began her blog (Modern Mommy Madness) because writing costs zero dollars and therapy costs a lot of dollars, and has continued to self-medicate by writing down all the things that she can't say out loud. Harmony is a fan of coffee, wine, and very sturdy undergarments, and can be found on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter.
Stop. Just stop.
In my first four months of sobriety, I packed on over 10 pounds. I needed to get ahold of myself, or risk developing a food addiction.
And yes, I say this even with bright blue varicose veins and dimples on my legs.
I don't spank to hurt. I spank to get my kids' attention.
Childbirth, combined with surviving colic and teething, seems to have armored me with a*shole-retardant shielding.
There aren’t many practical guides on this topic -- probably because everyone who is living it is too busy surviving to tell other parents how to do it.
See, when I was drinking and using, I didn’t care what people thought. I gave zero fu*ks. Now that I’m sober, I give a LOT of fu*ks.