Once you bring home that tiny precious bundle of joy and tears, Date Night is no longer organic. It’s not natural. It’s not easy. It’s not even on your Top Ten List of important things to do.
Feed baby, burp baby, change baby, bathe baby, attempt to feed self, hold baby, rock baby, take shower sometime in the span of next week, take a gazillion photos of baby, feed baby, burp baby, wipe barf off face and neck, change baby, change self, brush own teeth for first time in three days … did you say Date Night?
Regardless of the extraordinary effort it takes to organize a night out for mommy and daddy-time alone for you and your hubby is critical. It’s so easy to get absorbed into the excitement, joy, amazement, and yes, hard work of new parenthood that your real friendship with your partner can get overlooked.
A month or so after we had our first baby, I became suddenly overcome with the feeling that I missed my husband. It’s not that we weren’t spending time together. We were. It was just that the quality of the time was different. And as much as I was overjoyed with the new baby we shared together, I missed the moments we used to share just being us.
If you have family or close trusted friends nearby, enlist their support in a regular Date Night. It doesn’t have to be every week. Or even every two weeks. Once a month might be a good goal to start. But try to get it on the calendar. Even if it feels overwhelming and anxiety-producing to imagine leaving your baby, you will appreciate the time once you are gone.
Even if you spend all of it talking about why your darling munchkin is most definitely the new Golden Child and joyfully dissecting every detail of his waking hours down to the texture of his poop and the amount of snot you can retrieve out of the little bugger’s nose with your hospital-grade bulb syringe.
These are good times-parenthood style.